Archive for 2009

love local: an extra-special message for anyone trying to save the world

Hello, my name is Danielle and I'm a recovering Savior of the World. I used to think that my self-worth depended on my vegetarianism, my activism, futurism, my pro-this and anti-that. Had halo, would preach. Had 'isms, would teach.

I still wrestle with issues of spheres of influence (like one might wrestle a greased boa constrictor while wearing in a bikini - with great difficulty), but my circle of devotion has gotten decidedly more focused, or at least more proportioned. My a-ha on this came like a bolt of lighting, at a swanky event, in which I cried an ugly cry that I'll never forget.

I was at a weekend retreat in the Catsklills for thinkers thinking global-size thoughts. We fancied ourselves as change agents. And we were. The group of us was made up of economists, UN officials, socially responsible CEOs, media personalities, and bonafide spiritual leaders. Conversations were deeply meaningful and our love for our individual and shared causes cohered into a whole lotta serious inspiration. One of the afternoons was allotted for individual silent time and we were encouraged to reflect in solitude and then reconvene.

I spent some of my time in a dilapidated tree house in the woods. I journaled. I laid on the grass and cloud-watched. I thought about my "causes" and how much I poured into saving the world from all the things I thought it needed to be saved from. And my thoughts brought me home. Literally.

A few weeks before, my man and I got engaged. I was deep into thought about what commitment to a life together meant. The enormity of it, the sweetness of it, the terror of it....I thought of all that was required to be poured into it. And something in me cracked open that overcast day: I realized that most of my love was being poured outward, not homeward. It felt more noble to help people in far off countries and in future generations than it did to - simply - love the one I was with and love him well - the way he deserved to be loved.

We reconvened, sat in our fancy chairs in a circle, preparing to discuss our world-enhancing thoughts that had surfaced in our silent solitude. I wasn't aware of it for a few moments, but I was crying.

(Now, before I go any further with this story, it's essential that I tell you that I'm not a public crier. I don't even really like groups. I've done too many group workshops and those moments when sister gets up and bawls her eyes out about family of origin stuff or mister breaks down about his mean mother... well, I appreciate it. I feel deep compassion. Sometimes I admire those group-shared collapses. But I don't do it. My snot-gobbing heaving cries are sacred and best had in my bathtub or day bed. Except on this day, in front of the dignitaries and laureates. On this day, I was about to lose my shit like no other.)

The facilitator noticed me quietly whimpering. "Danielle, clearly you're moved. Would you like to share?" People were looking concerned and then I started to feel concerned because I noticed that I was really crying, like, my body was crying for me and there was no stopping it. For some reason, I grabbed the mic and I let 'er rip: "I, I, I just realized..." I was sobbing now, "I've been so fixated on the global, that, that, that... I've missed the love in my own home. I've, you know... I've missed the...the center of my circle." People nodded. I don't know if they related or thought I was pathetic. The silence was deafening.

And then I blew my nose and whimpered, "We can move on now." It was gross. And so we did. We talked about the layers of service and devotion and where we chose to put our energies. It was awkward and then beautiful and then powerful.

Everyone was really uncomfortably nice to me after that. I felt like they'd all seen my underpants, and I wasn't wearing any.

Am I happy that I slobbered all over my white shirt and blew my cover as a cool cucumber in front of those agents of change? Nope, not really. I'm just not that ego-less and evolved. I could have done without the high-exposure blubber fest. But it happened. And it put the world crises into perspective for me. And I went home. And for probably the first time, I was really home when I got there.

 

burning questions with susannah conway: beauty that heals

Susannah Conway reminds me of a hand painted tea cup: worn with love, cherished, elegant but wide open. Soothing. Something/someone you'd want to spend quality time with...talking about beauty and pop culture, and what it means to really notice your life. And what it means to create beauty and to be obsessed with that creating.

Susannah is happily afflicted with Polaphrenia, [noun, a clinical obsession with Polaroid film and cameras, often accompanied by an inability to control oneself when faced with a large stash of expired 600 film and a sunny day.] She is a photographer, a collector of moments, a seeker, and the creator of the incredibly popular "Unraveling" e-Course. And she is the first video interview on WhiteHotTruth.com, captured on film, beautifully. Naturally.

The next session of Susannah's e-course, Unravelling: Ways of Seeing My Self will be enrolling on Tuesday December 1st. The actual class begins on Monday January 4th and will definitely help to banish any January blues! The course will run for 8 weeks and the fee is £80 (British pounds). Every e-course Susannah offers sells out the day of enrollment, usually within two hours of being announced. Need I say more?

Find Susannah
Unravelling E-Course
SusannahConway.com
Twitter: @photobird
Facebook

Susannah is running a "My Creative Life" interview with me on her beautiful blog. Tune in, she asks grrreat questions.

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send papery love: my big, bold lovely note cards

 

fear management vs. fear leadership

The song of an entrepreneur...
Secretly, I'm afraid we won't raise the money. But it's okay. I can plow through that fear. We'll raise the money, and everything will be okay. We'll raise the money and stand the business up. We'll have to hit our targets, get the customers in the door, run hard with the marketing plan. Yeah, it's scary. What if they don't come? What if they come but don't buy? What if they buy, but not enough? It's okay, I can manage that fear. It'll work. I'll make it work and everything will be okay. We'll do this.

What if you don't do it? What if you, say, "fail"? Does that mean that fear wins? How much do you need to be more than "okay"?

While we're busy managing fear, fear can be managing us. It's still creeping in, grabbing at our pant leg, begging to be paid attention to. And fear can always find a reason to get your attention - that's it's job - to get you to feed it. But what about the flu? (feed me!) But what about the market? (feed me!) But what about ten years from now? (feed me!) But what will they think? (feed me!)

Beyond coping with fear there is fearlessness. Because, here's the white hot truth: if you go bankrupt, you'll still be okay. If you lose the gig, the lover, the house, you'll still be okay. If you sing off key, get beat by the competition, have to hand in the keys, you will still be okay. Ask anyone who's been through it. They're more than okay. People survive and they learn to thrive. It's life. It's business.

Don't manage your fear. Lead your fear. Take charge. When fear climbs on your shoulder and starts nattering in your ear, here's what you do: You stand as a master. You tell Scaredy Cat where you're going, risks and all, and you convert Scaredy into a champion to help you get there. You say, lovingly but firmly (because ultimately the Scaredy Cat in you just wants some love and you've got plenty of it to give,) "Yep, we may fail, it's possible. This is risky shit. But we'll still be okay. Because that's who we are. We're the kind of people that are okay, no matter what. So remember that invincibility and let's get to work. There's a new land to discover and the only way to find it is to keep going - cliffs, cash flow, agony, adulation and all. If you keep your mouth shut and your eyes wide open, we'll get there sooner. We're doing this. We're doing this because we want to. Because this is what it means to do life."

And then watch what Scaredy Cat does. She'll look perplexed for a minute. She'll nuzzle up, as if to say thank you. And then she'll strut down the street to help you recruit some new business.

 

 

yo, canada! tune into to CBC TV + me

Every Wednesday between 6pm to 8pm EST (4pm to 6pm PST) I'm on CBC TV's new national show, Connect With Mark Kelley. Look for this fancy lead in:

It's a total honour, because the CBC is a national treasure, the show is GOOD, and because Mark Kelly is such a total hotty. This is him smiling at me saying something really hilarious but searingly smart.

Want to see the show from wherever you are? I'd like that to. Email the producers and tell them to upload my stuff for y'all south of the border, and for any one who misses the show on Wednesdays. And if you catch the show and dig it, fan mail to the producers raving about my wry wisdom is good karma for everyone.

The Connect website
Connect on Twitter
Connect on Facebook
Email the producers fan mail about moi, or leave a comment on the blog

 

the psychedelics of strategic planning

The last time I did mushrooms, I was on my honeymoon. They were a wedding gift. (We have the best friends.) And the last time I dropped acid I was wearing shoulder pads and listening to The Flock of Seagulls. It's been a while. But since then, I've learned to alter my state, unassisted, and heighten my possibilities.

If you've done any psychedelic drugs you'll know that the "best" trips leave you expanded. You get a backstage pass to the Super Hero Concert of Life and you feel pretty freaking invincible. You see yourself in new shades and shapes. You score some privileged information. You come back to Earth with your groove on.

Wouldn't it be great to feel that mighty when you were mapping out your New Year, or writing your business plan? Wouldn't it be invigorating if, as you strategized, you really believed that anything was possible? That's the high of dreams. The divine stretch. Blue sky'ing. And it's essential to dynamic, robust strategies.

If you want a vital outcome, you need vitalized input. You gotta dance, shake it up, go extreme, hollah back and then come back to center where both possibility and pragmatism synergize. You've got to cross the line and get new information. That's why I ask some of my clients, "Look, if you, like dropped acid and wrote your business plan, what would it look like?" Works every time.

HOW TO UNLEASH YOUR STRATEGIC PLANNING POWER

1. The trip-prep: Analyze your dream fatigue. Sometimes you just get worn out from thinking big - especially entrepreneurs. Years of hard work, mid-course corrections, failures that lead to success, success that leads to failures. I've been there. After I left the company I co-founded last year, I could hardly bear to think about profit margins and wheeling new, big deals. I just wanted to write sutras and make soup. But dream fatigue will lift when you fully admit to it. Take stock, integrate your lessons - your new facts - and then move on, wiser for the wear. You simply cannot stop dreaming. You must, you must, dream a new dream.

2. Dream extreme. Loosen up. Unleash. Go wild. BE IMPRACTICAL. Get out of your box and stomp on it. Try egomania on for size. The phone rings. It's Oprah. Her staff have been reading your blog and they want to fly you to Chicago. Buddy in the cafe overhears you talking about your business plan and wouldn't you know it, he's a Venture Capitalist looking to unload some coin before the tax season ends. Your product is flying off the shelves. Bestseller. Soul mate. Awards. Radiance. Empire. The cover of Fast Company. TED Talks. Adulation. Overnight success. Euphoria.

FEEL THE HIGH OF THE EXTREME DREAM. Close your eyes and let your cells plump up with it. You should be peaking right about now.

3. While you're still tripping, imagine hanging with the Super Heroes of your industry. Assume that you are their contemporary. Ask for their grittiest stories and advice. Jam. Observe. Tell them your ideas, give them your pitch, sing them your song. Pay close attention to how they respond.

4. Come back to earth. Map out your plan - exactly from where you are. You may have found some courage or sagacity on the other side of the extreme dream. You may have imagined new possibilities. You may be thinking waaay bigger, or maybe much smaller, more precise. Either way, you'll know what super powers you want to focus on developing. And that's how you learn to fly. High.

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smart, kind, helpful people: my resource hot list

 

the red lipstick reporter interview: the psychology of style + branding

The very dynamic Tamara Gold at The Red Lipstick Reporter interviewed me recently about style, being real, and life balance. Click below to hear why I think the "pursuit of life balance"" is bullshit, why I felt like a phat fake when I was running a DC think tank, how to "announce your unfolding," and three questions to ask yourself about branding your business.

CLICK TO LISTEN TO TAMARA + DANIELLE:
http://www.audioacrobat.com/play/WfB5Kh2Q

Tamara is all about women's empowerment -- from your soul to your, well, lipstick. You can sign up for the weekly Report on the home page.

xo
Danielle

 

vancouver: gwen bell workshop saturday november 28

I'm really thrilled to be hosting Gwen Bell's Mind Body Tech Workshop in Vancouver on Saturday Nov. 28, 10am - 1pm. Location TBD. We're going to have a brand-mind-body-bending blast. Guaranteed.

Also, we'll be having a casual meet up a few nights before the workshop, so come on out! Wednesday Nov 25: Chill Winston in Gastown, 3 Alexander Street. 7pm.

CLICK HERE FOR WORKSHOP DESCRIPTION + REGISTRATION
http://vanmindbodytech.eventbrite.com/

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My Burning Questions with Gwen

 

burning questions with the queen of uncluttering, erin doland

Erin Rooney Doland always impresses me. She's A+ organized, but not chilly 'n uptight about it. She's a ruthless time manager, but always has time to help. She hangs with Quakers and speaks to the high-powered women's groups. And she's smart, really smart.

She is: Editor-In-Chief of the uber popular Unclutterer.com, a Real Simple.com columnist, and a mama to a new baby and a new book: Unclutter Your Life in One Week: A 7-Day Plan to Organize Your Home, Your Office, and Your Life, with a foreword by David Allen and a glowing endorsement from my (other) favourite organizer, Peter Walsh.

Erin Doland's motto: simplicity is revolutionary. Clear the clutter so you can pursue what you love the most.

1. What do you know the most about? (more...)

 

my 3 answers to those 3 simple success questions

In response to my 3 simple questions to simplify success article. Erika from the very thoughtful LifeBlazing.com wondered out-loud what my answers to these questions were. Hmmm. Good one. Here goes:

1. What do you do (that gives you joy, because why bother if it doesn’t bring you joy)?

First and foremost, I philosophize. It makes me feel wildly free and relatively useful. And that freedom is pure joy. Sometimes though, it makes me feel tangled, lost, and selfish.

In my early twenties, I did a meditation with Barbara Marx Hubbard. I saw two objects: a feather and a gold pen. And I heard very clearly (as if every cell of my being had it's own set of bionic ears,) that my purpose was to evoke the truth. (Just this year I learned that a feather is the Egyptian symbol for truth.) I believe your life purpose is what you say it is, so I decided to take that mission and make it mine.

I philosophize via writing, and speaking - on stage, on TV, online. I aggregate different wisdom sources. I deliver my stuff with transparency, and I pendulum between urgency and a 'whatever, all-in-good time' pace. And while I'm philosophizing and pacing, the result is that other people's truth tends to get piqued.

2. Who cares about what you do?

Meaning seekers and meaning makers. People who think. People who ache with that beautiful longing to live, really live. People who are interested in other people. People who contemplate and generate love ('cause love is a verb, and can't "just" contemplate it.) People who are interested in the thrill of entrepreneurship, of generosity, of financial freedom. Chicks and holistic men who are interested in the deeply divine Feminine, and creative, crazy fulfillment. People who probably read The Artist's Way, The Creative Habit, Good to Great, Alan Watts, Krishnamurti, Ken Wilber, Mary Oliver. They appreciate Oprah, pop culture, the I Ching. A few of them are design fanatics. They recycle, religiously.

3. How do you get to who cares?

TWO WAYS. One is purely energetic, the other is literal and promotional.

Method #1: I "get to people" by being as real as I can possibly be. Authenticity is magnetic, after all. I claim my place as a teacher. I maintain my role as a student. My most stirring and "popular" writing are the pieces that are the most self-revealing, provocative and/or poetic. I put myself at the center of the equation, but I still maintain a deep level of privacy and solitude for myself and the people in my life. (This is why I'm not a diarist.)

Method #2: I broadcast my stuff to the max. Every medium - print, TV, blogs, interviews, stationery, gigs - I am committed to rocking out in multi-media, far and wide.

Why? Because meaning seekers and meaning makers are everywhere.

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Go to my personal Amazon store for my list of inspirational to business books.

 

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