Archive for 2009

what are your words for the new year?

Every new year some words choose me, like a magic spell to be cast on the year ahead. This year's ensemble showed up as it's own little poem of truth: Pure Love Innovates.

pure
This may or may not mean something to you, but I have five planets in Virgo (tho' my Sun sign is Gemini, which explains why I do what I do: communicate to the nth.) All that Virgo makes for an obsession with purifying, detoxing, Zen-ifying, eradicating all forms of physical and mental clutter from the known universe, and running through the desert naked. Also explains my kin with fire - the greatest purifier of all. It's not as heavy as it sounds.

• free from anything of a different, inferior, or contaminating kind; free from extraneous matter: pure gold; pure water.
• unmodified by an admixture; simple.
• clear; free from blemishes: pure skin.
• (of literary style) straightforward; unaffected.
• abstract or theoretical (opposed to applied ): pure science.
• without any discordant quality; clear and true: pure tones in music.
• absolute; utter; sheer: to sing for pure joy.
• being that and nothing else.
• clean, spotless, or unsullied: pure hands.
• untainted with evil; innocent: pure in heart.
• ceremonially or ritually clean.
• free of or without guilt; guiltless.
• independent of sense or experience: pure knowledge.

love

"L-o-v-e" is so overdone, used, abused, misused. This year it occurred to me that Joni Mitchell and I might have one more thing in common than just our citizenship: "I've looked at love from both sides now / from give and take, and still somehow / it's love's illusions I recall / I really don't know love at all." I want to know it and give it. I want to be loving in every way possible.

Marriage is not a love affair,
it's an ordeal.
It is a religious exercise, a sacrament,
the grace of participating in another life.

If you go into marriage with a program,
you will find that it won't work.

Successful marriage
is leading innovative lives together,
being open, non-programmed.
It's a free fall: how you handle each new thing as it comes along.

As a drop of oil on the sea,
you must float,
using intellect and compassion
to ride the waves.

- Joseph Campbell

innovates
admit, bring forward, bring in, coin, conceive, commence, develop, discover, enter, establish, evolve, found, generate, give birth to, hatch, inaugurate, initiate, induct, initiate, install, invent, kick off, launch, make, open up, organize, pioneer, plan, preface, present, produce, set up, spark, start, unveil, usher in.

The year is New. So are you. See you on the other side.
xo
Danielle

 

with every cell of my being, thank you, thank you very much

A friend once asked me if I'd write if I didn't have an audience. My answer: "nope."

That same week The World's Strongest Librarian made a comment to me to the affect of, "we write because we need to, right?" It sounded so noble compared to my admission.

This got me analyzing my potential narcissism, neuroses and persona. From where do I derive my joy? The giving or the receiving? The process or the packaging? Am I in this for the glory or have I truly got the guts of an artist? Did Elvis sing in the shower?

The conclusion: I don't actually need to write, not like Anais Nin did, or Henry Miller. I don't journal. My bookshelf is less than 20% fiction. I've never been to a writing workshop.

What I need - like I need clean water, kisses, and milk chocolate at 3pm, is to share what I've found in my search for meaning. I yearn to philosophize. My voice - written, spoken, sketched - engages me with life. Either Rumi or God or Orpheus planted a mechanism in my brain that compels me to broadcast my epiphanies in anyway I can. Even on my most interior and complex pursuits I'm thinking to myself, "Can't wait to register this a-ha in The Ever Evolving Big Mix of Cosmic A-ha's." The mix of us-ness. The mix of heartbreak and euphoria, collapses, and victories of determined love. Our mix. My art doesn't work without the Our.

So I thank you. Thank you. For listening. For hearing, cheering and even for leering. Your readership and conversation are the alchemy that makes the pixels meaningful. This ain't just a blog, or a drop in the bucket, this is a sacred feeding-post on the way to more. More to be grateful for.

2010 Blazing Blessings,
Danielle

 

the stop doing list via live tv

View the segment: STOP DOING Lists ... Mark Kelley and I talk it up this week.

 

stop doing list: part 2 whereby i dictate what to stop

My What's Your Stop Doing List? yielded some cheers. And multiple poetic replies. So poetic that it raised my brow. My right eyebrow arches when I'm being scrutinizing in that really helpful keener (potentially annoying) way. All of the psycho-emotional lovely answers that poured in here and on Twitter and Facebook had me surmise that when it comes to literal to-do's that should be converted into to-don'ts, we habitually resist. My poll was partly a bust.

So I'm flagging the STOP SIGN. Because I want you to free up oodles of time to groove with the Great Essentials of life - and so you can read all the new books I'm launching. Priorities.

15 ACTIVITIES TO STOP DOING THAT WILL FREE YOUR TIME AND YOUR MIND...AND THE REST WILL FOLLOW

1. Stop checking email obsessively. Have you heard? If you're checking email every five minutes, you're checking it 24,00 times a year. Unclutterer.com has some good e-ddiction perspectives.
2. Stop paying everyone else before you pay yourself. It will ease your stress and less stress = more time. (Disclaimer: I have, more than once, paid my staff when there wasn't enough cash flow to pay me as well. That's just leadership.)
3. Stop lugging. Double up on tools. I have two sets of: power cords, mice, earphones, and makeup kits.
4. Stop last minute, rushing, drag-your-ass trips to the grocery store, bank, and video store. HAVE IT DELIVERED. Get a food delivery service for your organics, set up direct bank deposits and auto payments, get DVDs by mail.
5. Stop doing the tasks that are not in your natural skill set, or suck time from doing what you do best that earns the moula. OUTSOURCE. The upspringing of Virtual Assistants is a phenomenon that enables you to get anything done for anywhere from $4 to $70/an hour, from India to Nebraska, from Twitter pages to legal docs. Invest in your freedom.
6. Stop going out of your way to get to a computer. This may sound contradictory on a time-save list but, I think i-Phones can save time and create space. The "I don't want people to think they can get a hold of me anytime" argument is weak. Master your domain and give yourself the POWER OF MOBILITY.
7. Stop shopping for and buying gifts that need to be wrapped. It's a rule that means you buy experiences and gift certificates for things like, concert and conference tickets, magazine subscriptions, MP3s.
8. Stop cleaning your house yourself. I seethe with resentment when I'm cleaning my stove because I could be doing something I love that makes me money. I did the math: in the three hours it takes to really clean the house, I could do a Fire Starter Session or write an article that would bring me $300 to $3000. Or nap.
9. Stop with the perfectionism. Give people a chance to rise to the occasion. My kid can dress himself (rubber boots and surf shorts look great!) Staff can figure out most things (mistakes are useful.)
10. Stop doing it alone. Team with experts. A great coach, designer, consultant, can create quantum leaps.
11. Stop subscribing. Rather than just hitting delete, go through the steps (too many steps too often) to keep your inbox squeaky clean.
12. Stop taking home "free" stuff - pens, kitsch-filled gift bags from networking events, ugly volunteer t-shirts. You will spend time moving it around or pawning it off at your neighbour's yard sale.
13. Stop forcing yourself to finish every book you pick up because you think the ghost of your English teacher is watching.
14. Stop dying your hair. At least consider it. For that matter, examine all of your beauty synthetics and waxes and plucks and extensions and wonder how hot and less-stressed you'd be without all that maintenance. Acrylic nails do not help you be more successful. And my theory is that the world is rife with bottle-blondes who'd look much better as brunettes.
15. As for time-sucking fears and neuroses, maybe you need the 5 minute shrink appointment: (click to view video)

 

burning questions with naomi dunford, domanatrix of itty biz

A straight-talking female entrepreneurial adviser, SEO cracker jack, with a giving heart who knows her value and has a proclivity for fishnets? How could I not be smitten? What I love about Naomi Dunford's work is that it's a) incredibly practical and logical, and b) it radiates an intention of "I'm really here to help you. Really."

If you feel shitty, Naomi is there for you. If your customers are telling you they're too broke to buy your great stuff, Naomi is there for you. If you're scared that you don't have an ounce of creative great stuff in your marrow, yep, Naomi is there for you. With the real goods - generous intelligence and the crack of her whip. Take that! She knows you need what she's got. Bad.

1. What do you know to be true, unquestionably beyond doubt, certain with every cell of your being, completely, passionately, righteously certain?

You know, it's taken me a week to answer this question and now, finally, I've realized that I can't let you sit there waiting for my answers forever, while I think about what it is that I'm certain about. Perhaps it's best to be honest and say... nothing. I don't think I'm that certain of anything. I have been certain about so many things and the jarring proof of my wrongness has always been immediate and in direct proportion to the level of my certainty.

Maybe I'm most certain that it is wise to avoid certainty.

2. What was the dumbest thing that you used to believe in?

That I had to make lots of money to be happy. (more...)

 

what’s on your stop doing list?

I'm starting to map out my creativity intentions for 2010. (I prefer not to use the word "plan" - seems so flat. "Intentions" feels fused with both direction and moxy.) Much is swirling in my DNA. Three new books...maybe five. Concepts with roots. Roots growing concepts. Streams of coin, streams of giving... And white space. Mostly white space - can never seem to get enough of it.

If I'm to realize my intentions, what I stop doing is just as important as what I start and continue to do. Stopping = the white space. Stopping = room to run free and create from the deepest place of being without restraint or compromise. Stopping = more time for what matters most.

I know how to go, go, go. Stopping, I've learned is the stuff of mastery.

Master Jim Collins sums it up brilliantly in this USA Today article. He brings forward three profoundly simple questions from Darwin Smith CEO Kimberly-Clark, which became the foundation of the Hedgehog Concept:

1) What are you deeply passionate about?
2) What are you are genetically encoded for — what activities do you feel just "made to do"?
3) What makes economic sense — what can you make a living at?

If your answers to what you're doing come up no, no, and no to these questions - then stop doing it. Shut 'er down. Take it off your plate. Let it die. Cease. And exhale a sigh of relief. You can move with more velocity toward your dreams.

Look back on this year and get very clear about what sucked. What didn't work, got mired with resentment, felt onerous, weighed you deadly down? A note on resentment: you can't continue to do things you fully resent and think they're going to transform into enjoyable activities over time. It just doesn't work that way. Think of resentment as a blaring, mega-watt STOP sign. And stop.

WHAT'S YOUR STOP DOING LIST? Here's mine for 2010:

1. No red eyes flights. Ever. Never worth it.
2. I will not leave Twitter, Facebook and Gmail open while I write. I need blocks of two to three hours to think clearly and craft that clarity into something useful. Writing is a "yes!" to all three of the questions.
3. No schlepping my old book to speaking gigs to sell. Forget it. I pay for extra luggage, I cuss at my suitcase as I'm heaving it up escalators. And besides, since I left my last company, I don't make a cent off of the book (because I signed the copyright over to the incorporation.) See questions 2 and 3: I'm not passionate about it. I can't make a living at it.
4. I will continue to lovingly decline requests for on-going coaching. I'm a Strategist. Capital S on that. I do my very best work around creativity and entrepreneurship, facing forward, thinking big while being ruthlessly pragmatic. I'm not great at untangling things that happened yesterday. See question 2. I'm just not made for it.
5. I will not pursue a conventional publishing deal for my next project. I will fly higher, faster, on my own for the next round. Innovate or die.
6. I'll stop answering business-related email on weekends. I've thought of putting "I don't work weekends" in my e-signature, but that'd be just obnoxious.

All of the above activities only serve to make me busier, or put me out of the zone of my true strengths. (And you know how I feel about busy-ness.) Stopping what's distracting, draining, or aggravating you doesn't require any heavy lifting or stamina. Just love and self respect.

So seriously, consider this a poll. WHAT WILL YOU STOP DOING FOR 2010? What ACTIVITIES are coming OFF your to-do list? What will create more space when you get it off your plate? This will be the topic for my CBC TV segment this week and I'm trolling for your chutzpah and boundary-championing.

xo
Danielle

 

the best list ever, by Danielle: vol. 1

The best of anything and everything. Random fantastic stuff that left an impression on my frontal lobe and softened heart. Do your own list. Do it here if you fancy, we've got the time and space. "The Best List Ever, by [insert your name]: Vol. 1. It'll make you simmer with sweet memories and proof of excellence. Here we go. This is gonna feel goood.

MY BEST LIST EVER. 100% adored. In no particular order.

1. The Missing Piece Meets The Big O, by Shel Silverstien. The most elegant and charming description of human relationships. Heartbreaking, really. It's my favourite wedding gift to give.
2. Wim Wenders', Wings of Desire and Far Away So Close. Made me want to fall in love, fly, move to Berlin, french-kiss Lou Reed, and talk to my angels.




3. Leonard Cohen at the Palo Solari in Santa Fe. Circa '95. Under the stars. A hot night. Angelic backup singers. Oozing the most Zen-Let's-All-Make-Love-Right-Now vibe humanly possible. Religious.
4. Dip big strawberries in sour-cream, and then dip it into brown sugar. Divine. Great picnic treat.
5. Pangea Organics Japanese Matcha Tea with Acai & Goji Berry Facial Mask. Incredible product from one of the most eco-progressive beauty companies, ever.
6. WordPress. There's a reason why Google bought it.
7. The Arlington Institute's FutureEdition. Best aggregation of news in global trends and outliers.
8. Pecha Kucha Night speaking events. 20 slides. 20 seconds each to talk about whatever inspires you (or me). Brilliant format.
9. Honey Beeswax Candles. I'm fanatical about them. They clean the air, are thus merciful on your lungs, and last forever. I order mine from an equally fanatical craftsman in a small town in Ontario.
10. Tweezermans.
11. Krishnamurti. Total Freedom.
12. Allan Watts. Beyond Theology.
13. Sir Ken Robinson's TED Talk. How schools kill creativity. Hilarious and profound.
14. Soul centering sessions with Navjit Kandola.
15. Project jamming with Dyana Valentine.
16. The lavender milk chocolate sauce on Belgian waffles at Medina Cafe, Vancouver.
17. Jim Morrison's An American Prayer.
18. Maya Angelou speaking on stage in San Francisco. Proud poetic power personified.
19. Cheryl Sorg's text art. Got me one this year.
20. Patricia Larsen's abstract paintings. Got me one last year.
21. That time with S. in the cabin, doing that thing S. does so well.
22. Silk Concept duvets. Lux sleepies, no more cold feet, eco-kind.
23. Little Miss Sunshine.





24. Eminence Organics Yam & Pumpkin Enzyme Peel. Indispensable for ye ol' skin glow. Use it twice a week.
25. Paper Mate Medium Point blue pens. I've tried fancy fountain pens, mechanical pencils that made me look designy-cool. But it's the good n' cheapies that do the trick.
26. Your Sex is on Fire, Kings of Leon
27. Red Hot Chili Pepper's Stadium Arcadium. If you don't love this double CD, I'm not sure that we can be friends.
28. Rilke! "I want to unfold, for where I am folded, there I am a lie."
29. Rumi...Rumi...my love. "You were born with wings. Why prefer to crawl through life?"
30. Mary Oliver, sistah. "What will you do with your one wild and precious life?"
31. This advice from a mentor when it all fell apart: Know your rights.
32. Anthropolgie
33. Bella Cucina's Artichoke Lemon Pesto. It even made Oprah's list. (Tho' my list is so much juicer, don't you agree?)
34. Beauty, by John O' Donohue. Anything by John O'Donohue, really.
35. Hallelujah, as sung by kd lang, whom I think is one of the most masterful song interpreters ever. This performance makes me want to pull out all the stops in my life. And then be incredibly modest about it.




36. Pet insurance. Just get it.
37. Ten Thousand Waves. Santa Fe, NM. Heaven, hot tubs, and Indian oil in the hills. Heav-en.
38. The best moment with my kid, ever. We're eating chocolate cones outside an ice cream parlor at dusk. Me: "So, pookie, what's it like being alive?" The Kid (without missing a beat): "Oh mama! It's AAA-MAZ-ing! If I were a telephone, I'd be ringin' all the time!"

... to be continued ...

 

busy? ’nuff whining.

Click to watch this week's segment: me bitchin' about people bitchin' about being busy.

 

burning questions with kelly diels: cleavage + faith

Have you seen Kelly Diels' cleavage? It's deep. She writes with rapier wit and overflowing love, about "everything we all want more of: sex, money, and meaning." And feminism. And Malcolm Gladwell. Yep. She's hot.

I read everything she writes. EVERYTHING, honey.

1. What’s your super hero name? (You have one. To discover it, stand with your legs apart and hands on your hips, tits up and eyes to the sky. It’ll come to you. FYI, Mine is Agent Now, which in French translates to L’Agent Maintenent. Adorable n'est pas?)

Madame Passionista. I wear a chain skirt strung with laptop keys and knee high - hell, thigh-high - boots that are not made for walking. My primary super power is the blazing epistle of righteousness and my secondary one is unmentionable in certain circles but makes me very, very popular.

2. What's the best advice you've been given in terms of writing or creativity?

Believe.

3. What do you know to be true, unquestionably beyond doubt, certain with every cell of your being, completely, passionately, righteously certain?

That I am loved.

4. What global policy, credo, practice or law would you like to decree?

This is heavy: an end to sexual abuse in all forms.

5. What book(s) are you always telling people to read?

Freakonomics. I freaking love it. I love work that uses old tools - like economic theory and modeling - in new and quirky ways. I also adore the way my future husband, Malcolm Gladwell, spins essays into intellectual whodunnits.

But my favourite book of all time is To Kill A Mocking Bird.

6. I’m going to give you a word. Tell me what the first thing that comes to mind when you read it… Ready? The word is: instigate.

Shit disturber. My girls. Myself. Provocateur.

7. What question are you currently living?

Faith? Faith. It is new to me. Faith in myself, faith in the universe, faith in the leap and the fall, faith in those that love me and those who don't, faith in my instincts - I'm sidling up to faith.

Bonus Q: Before we go, Tina Turner asked me to ask you: Kelly, What's love got to do with it, got to do with it?

Oh, EVERYTHING, honey.

. . . . . . .

FIND KELLY DIELS
Cleavage.com
Twitter: @kellydiels
Facebook

 

best packaging of 2009

Did your headphones come in a sweet case? See a bottle of tea in another country that stood off the shelves?

My vote: One Condoms. It's about time.

 

READ MORE