how have you changed?

Danielle LaPorte. Grade 1. Haircut by dad.

Danielle LaPorte. Grade 1. Haircut by dad.

"People change all the time and forget to tell each other."
Lillian Gershwin

If you doubt that change happens, dig me in 1976 {see picture above!} Change is a marvelous thing to celebrate. Acknowledging growth helps us to keep on growing. Taking stock of the leagues you've traveled is especially useful for those of us who drive ourselves so hard to be...whatever we're craving to be.

: I used to have glasses. And then I had lazer eye surgery.
: I used to believe in soul mates, in "The One." And then I learned that "The One" is "The One" because you say he is.
: I used to be angry and didn't know why. Now I'm righteous but happy.
: In my twenties I WILLED it to happen. Now I allow it to happen.
: I used to need ritual. Now I just want the peace that lies beyond structure, even ritual.
: I no longer care if you don't agree with me. My heart is softer. I have more room for more opinions than my own.
: I used to think I had to earn my keep, sing for my supper. Now I follow my bliss and the feast finds me.
: I used to 'round up', adding a little glow to the story here 'n there. Now I relish the weightless cleanliness of precise and plain communication - which can still be done poetically.

And the list goes on...evolution is always spiraling outward, upward, seeking it's own creative edge. Ducklings turn into swans. Feminists turn into humanists. Hearts heal. The narrow expands. There's much to celebrate.

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  • MoJo
    Heee-heeeee!!! I love this pic (and I have one almost the same, but with big buck teeth!) Going to take a few minutes to acknowledge the changes....great post. thx.
  • My biggest changes; Living a life based on a set of Spiritual Principles and that my happiness is not contingent on my circumstances.
  • "I used to think I had to earn my keep, sing for my supper. Now I follow my bliss and the feast finds me." I'm adding that to my quote book. You're awesome.
  • Excellent. As usual, your words are like liquid gold.

    What struck me most strongly was the urge to give the little girl a big hug and ask her about her dreams, plans and hear her views and perspectives on the world. What a wonderful picture. Your essence and energy come through then and now.
  • I hit 'submit' before I really meant to do so... I'd like to add:

    In the spirit of your post, in coaching a client today MY big takeaway was how the simple act of acknowledgment expands learning and marinates it into our bones.
  • I wasn't going to comment on this topic because I got information overload when I thought of all the ways in which I've changed in just the past 2 years, alone. I didn't know where I could possibly start to list them all. All great stuff, many of which appear on your list, too. It feels great to know that there has been value in all that I've experienced so far and that I HAVE learned a few things along the way. And there are more great things to come, I know. I'm bracing myself!
  • Suzanne
    I love this post, Danielle. I just recently started subscribing to your feed, and it has already become one of the few emails that I always look forward to reading. It is so interesting to think about how I have changed. My meditation teacher spoke this evening about how during the first half of your life, things are very black and white, but after age 35 or so, you begin to see shades of grey. Your words, "My heart is softer. I have more room for more opinions than my own," reminded me of how my teacher described the more "open-hearted" second part of life.

    Speaking of reminding, I thought I would share my 1975 kindergarten pic, because yours reminded me a lot of me at that age - glasses, cool haircut: http://www.flickr.com/photos/bigpeace/3405296435/
  • OMG, that photo is a riot!

    I'm very glad to hear, btw, that I'm not the only one who suffered through haircuts given by my parents.
  • EVERYBODY: click on Suzanne's flickr link and prepare to GRIN.
  • Menehune
    Excellent
  • Jeri Lynn Chandler
    Really appreciate this post. I find my own changes are out in front of 'me' somewhere. Forget about family and friends, it's the former me's that need a heads up!

    Thanks xo Jeri Lynn

    P.S. The reading of your " No pity for a strong soul" post was well received at the PHA benefit last Saturday.
  • "I find my own changes are out in front of 'me' somewhere" -- this reminds me of a Carl Jung quote: sometimes you need to throw your dream out infront of you and walk into it.
    thanks for the report on the reading.
    ox
  • Love this post (as I do so many of them!). This is somewhat off-subject, but I just wanted to tell you I love the kid/hair photograph. It's very very fun, cute dorky-cool. I recently did a 'hair' photo album on my facebook page, with photos of my hairdos through the ages, and it was so much fun to do, looking through and scanning all those old photos and seeing how great and cute I looked in some and how hilariously bad I looked in others (80's mall hair....need I say more?). It was, albeit superficial and not particularly enlightening, a most amusing little trip down memory lane.

    Looking forward to our Fire Starter Session on Friday - woohoo!

    Cheryl
  • Kim
    Danielle, I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your posts. I have been following you daily from style statement to white hot truth and you just keep getting better and better. You always seem to come from a place of truth, clarity and passion. It truly resonates with me. After years of pleasing others, I am finally figuring out what I want and trusting the process. Thanks for helping me with my journey.
  • I love this! Absolutely love it! I so identify with what you say. I laughed out loud at the "rounding up" observation. That was always me. My family and friends would be like, "Really, was it really that many? Did it really happen that way?" Now, I try to be as true to what happened as the filter of my perception will allow. And lo and behold, life as it actually unfolds, has its own glow!

    BTW, you were adorable! Still are.
  • Natalie
    This is lovely! It has encouraged me to vist my life and document the changes I've had.

    Thank you for sharing!
  • Well said, thank you.
  • Hi Danielle,

    Are you planning on doing any sessions in Chicago? We'd love to see you speak!
  • sure! email me: d@daniellelaporte.com and let's talk.
    xo
  • Emily-Sarah
    What a wonderful treat to see a childhood photo of you! Love it! My Yogi Bedtime tea bag last night held this nugget: "Live from your heart and you will be most effective." And yes, there is much to celebrate. Personally, after seeing my dad close to death a few hours ago (he's a diabetic and his glucose bottomed -- never experienced anything at that almost comatose level before), my own celebration meter has certainly been reset. Blessings abound amid the stresses and injustices of life-at-large. I hope we will all decide to fine tune our hearts to notice and capture all the beautiful stuff floating through our individual atmospheres today.
  • Emily-Sarah-
    I'm glad your dad is feeling better and on better footing now. Here's to his health!
  • "celebration meter" -- love it. hope yours tips the scales.
  • Danielle - I agree wholeheartedly. It's so important to honor and own your own changes, especially when people who really love you are attached to the old you. I don't think it's so much about announcing the changes - "Yoohoo, I've changed, I'm the new me!!!" because that can leave people feeling abandoned. For me, it's more a matter of softly, camly, sticking to my guns, and noticing when I'm playacting my old self because I think it's what's expected.
  • this is an important point you make. I think you do have two choices: announcements vs. quietly holding your (new) ground. sometimes family need the 2by4, I find, they've been around so long. Long time friends...nice 'n gentle.
  • biren
    danielle... your posts are such a soothing salve to the frayed nerves of the heart... a heart that doesn't know any better than following the world rather than itself...
  • danielle- this is a beautiful post. Your changes are powerful -yes and by putting them into words to be read and reread you make them a little more real and give us permission to mark our own. thx.
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