what your repulsions have to say about you

 
 

What repels you? Nosy neighbors. Organized religion? Bohemia? Modern design or gold-gilded embellishments?

Knowing what does not work for you is a powerful tool for creating more of what does work for you. Measuring positive feelings against negative feelings is one of the constructive ways to use comparison, and it’s a great way to tune into our deeper truth.

Write down 10 things that creep you out, turn you off, or drive you nuts. Then ask yourself why it bugs you? Is it a past association, an unexamined story that you’ve been telling yourself, an indicator of your truest values?

(My list goes something like: people who walk in without knocking, lack of gratitude, airy fairy types, wood paneling, relentless sarcasm as a barrier to intimacy, red & black as a clothing colour combo, when people call and say, "Can you call me back?" without leaving more of an explanation. Long winded explanations.

When I look at the first cut of my peeve list it has a lot to do with standards of respect and privacy. My values. And wood paneling reminds me of a childhood home that I swear was haunted.)

Is there anything on your list that’s taking up too much space in your life, or...could be re-assessed and maybe even embraced by you?

Contrast is an excellent teacher.

←   read all current inspiration articles

join the convoposted 22 Sep 09 in: inspiration + spirituality articles   ·   tags: ,   ·   View Comments

• Follow Danielle on Twitter • Follow Danielle on Facebook

  • My easy rant list starts with plastic dry cleaner bags, but that's not why I'm commenting. I'm writing to thank you for your inspirational, motivational, thought-provoking and sometimes slightly crazy posts and to honor you with a Kreativ Blogger award. Congratulations! You can learn all about the award at our blog. http://maukamakai.wordpress.com/2009/10/01/krea...
  • Great post. I'm going to sit with your questions. It's easy to write a rant list; much harder to do what you suggest and ask what the deeper lesson is behind the hate.
  • Very interesting! My turn-offs? People who are intolerant, ignorant, and unaccepting of those who are different than them. And that's pretty accurate in describing me if I'm the contrast - I'm trusting, a big ball of warm fuzzies, and want to be friends w/ everyone :)
    Great points!
  • We're on the same wavelength. Today I was reflecting on the "9 wounds of the body" and it was a major turn-off at first to think of my own body as this open wound to be healed. It grossed me out. I get it now, and you're right, recognizing repulsion the moment it arises is deeply freeing. A regular sitting practice puts it all in front of you, in rapid fire sometimes. The distractions are often those nagging "silent limbs" for which we desperately need to care.
  • 'relentless sarcasm as a barrier to intimacy' yes!
    And I recognise that I used to do this myself as a protective/deflective layer from the bullying I had received as a child. After a couple of big losses through death and divorce I was so stripped bare I had nothing left to hide. Now I let all of me shine through.
    When I see it in others I do not 'feed it' but let them know that I see past it. Sometimes this is as much as direct eye contact. Or not laughing along with the crowd.
    Contrast is a great teacher - yes indeed.
  • Self-absorbed people, which ties into a lack of awareness and lack of consideration for others; NOISE - leaf blowers should be banned; ill-fitting clothing - especially open toed shoes with long toes grabbing over the edge - I call them prehensile toes, even worse if the shoes are white patent leather platforms ... this must tie into early indoctrination to Glamour's Do's & Don'ts; bad design and poor craftsmanship - in anything. That one goes deep, I can feel the urge to rant coming on, so I best stop now.
  • Annah
    Kathy - that really made me Laugh out Loud (overuse of acronyms is something that I hate!) The "prehensile toes" thing is so dead-on! It also gives me the heebie-jeebies to see someone with long, french manicured toenails. Disgusting! (I guess that ties into me disliking things that are phoney baloney and pretentious - along with fake tans, silicone boobs, bleach blonde hair - doing things to live up to someone else's standards of what's real. I live in Dallas, and see A LOT of this!)
  • Haha I really like this idea! I'm going to examine after work..definitely starting to think of some things...
  • but... there's red and black all over your site! You mean on clothing? Looking forward to figuring out mine. Doing the 'what attracts you and why' list was amazingly helpful to me when it came time to write an artist statement for a fellowship application. Can't thank you enough!
  • YES! thank you - let me refine that -- RED & BLACK IN CLOTHING. Too Kung Fu for me.
  • ok- on the red and black thing- my teenage bedroom was all big marimekko flowers in red,black and white. [ http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_7cT-N57JZYY/R2wHBVsFv... Loved it then- and it is a thing of the past.

    I just wrote a piece on a whole other theory about people who repel you- they might represent disowned parts of oruseves and there is room for us to bring some of thsoe qualiteis back to ourselves in a way that feels right for us now..[http://pearlmattenson.com/email/newsletter_september09.html]
blog comments powered by Disqus